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Sunday, November 22, 2009

Why You're Not Getting Hired

Did you happen to see this article, either on the Yahoo home page, or on CNN Money?

Despite millions of job seekers, many positions sit open, By Jessica Dickler, staff writer

   Does anyone else find this disturbing? I do. For years, I have tailored resumes to suit a myriad of employers/employment situations, to no avail. I'm beginning to realize something that perhaps many before me already knew. Specifically, recruiters and employers may think that they want good, honest, talented, capable, hard-working employees..., but what they actually seek, are rocket-scientists..., or damned liars.

When I look through the weekly ads that show up in my inbox, I scan over positions that either require many more years of experience than I possess, along with several very specific criteria, including a variety of unique certifications. Usually, I think to myself... is this just one of those jobs that they have to advertise to the public, when in fact they are really just going to hire some flunky friend/relative from within? Or, do they really think that they are going to find this super-person?

What I'm getting at is this: I think that companies and recruiters are going about the hiring process completely the wrong way(s). If they really want to fill positions they should be more flexible; they should either hire one of the millions of unemployed people out there who have years of experience, but who lack the education sought, and train them; or, hire one of the millions of college graduates, who have the desired education, but who lack the many years of experience required, and take a chance... and help them accrue experience.

It seems to me that the process is being made more complex than is necessary. Years ago employers didn't insist that you have dozens of certifications for software etcetera, in addition to having experience, and degrees.

Further, there were two things in particular that bugged me about that aforementioned article. The first was this statement:

'We've gotten close to 300 résumés for a service coordinator position. Out of that we brought in four people'...


... "Those that didn't make the cut included someone with previous experience as an office clerk and a job applicant with a bachelor's in mathematics, currently employed at a café." 

IF THIS GUY IS A MATH WIZ SHOULD THAT DISQUALIFY HIM? IF HE'S VERSATILE ENOUGH TO WORK AT A COFFEE SHOP, DON'T YOU THINK THAT HE PERHAPS COULD ADAPT TO THE UBER-GENERAL JOB OF COORDINATOR. I've been a coordinator, so I know this job very well. It is nothing but a glorified administrative assistant position. Give this guy the job already! And, 4 out of 300 is ridiculous! I could interview, select, hire, and train a high-school student, who has no college education or experience to dot that job, all in less than a week! What is HR doing out there, besides screwing up?

The second set of statements that bugged me follow:
 "Willoughby recently instituted a hiring incentive program to encourage existing employees to refer viable candidates. Those responsible for bringing in new hires are eligible to receive $2,500 to $5,000, depending on the position. She has also added in a signing bonus for the new employees.";
'Eighty percent of jobs are being obtained on personal referrals so candidates that are spending the bulk of their time sending their resume out blindly are not being the most fruitful," said Carolyn Thompson, president of CMCS, a boutique staffing firm near Washington, D.C.' 
So, what they're saying is, we are willing to give money away to people who are already employed, so that they can recommend their friends, and family members for jobs, instead of taking a chance hiring a non-connected person, who lacks one or two of our oddball criteria, even if that means that most of our jobs will go unfilled, while millions of people remain unemployed. What a waste of $$. Furthermore, I just have to wonder if this minute pool of cohorts could possibly match all of those same criteria for employment, more readily than millions of other applicants. Me don' t'ink so! (Sorry, every once in a while, I get in the mood to don an accent.) Forgiveness p'reas!

Anywho, am I wrong? If so, let me know. Otherwise, I'll just keep babbling on, foaming at the mouth, rolling my eyes, crossing my arms, shaking my head (You get the picture.)


plainolebob said...

IT is crazy out there any more, I use to hire and fire people, and did that for years.
These hr people now days are really out there at times.
But you know what it is now a days they hire by committee, and computer feed back, they do a background check that is flawed, and they don't take into consideration the persons potentional as much as they do what the paper says. I can find out more about a person in a five min. interview than any five page resume will ever tell me.
sorry to rant,
I am employed cause I ain't got no job.

AJAB said...


I'm with ya. I've always been curious about the accuracy of background checks; like how frequently do HR managers get incorrect information about applicants?

I Googled myself once and found an exact match for my rather long name, and located a pole-dancer!

(FYI Recruiters... THAT AIN'T ME! ;)

A Jab At Work Poetry (Poetry about Work)

“Work” by AJA-B, 08/30/09

The life I live is full of Joy,
But fool of sadness have I been,
If rumblings uttered prove us coy,
Then, truth be told both where, and when,
Was once a pair that teetered then,
O’er brinks or hills,
That they could scarce,
Find liquid, bars of salt, but bills,
And toil, though notice paid none dare’st,
To sweat, and pack, and tape, and wrap,
To call, and quest, rebuffed for cost,
To drive five states, and back, for gas
Traverse, from here to there to drink,
While aching back, and sweat-soaked shirt,
Proved naught the laborers’ worth, but stink,
And why should hecklers, wreckers blurt,
And hurl insults until they hurt,
While hypocrites sit conditioned in,
Till out a pair sent all they’d earned,
To others seeking extra, win,
‘gainst those that taught themselves, and learned,
Volumes, nearly choked and burned,
As plumes of hate, and stacks of smoke,
Sparked flames, which brinksmanship, did stoke,
Hellacious fires that GOD awoke,
& Smote the devils’ flames whose’ fire,
Could not the heights of clouds aspire,
& Up the pair in now a shell,
found seeds to plant that vines did swell,
Fat, filling, fruit and tasty cheer,
Revealing teeth, “from ear to ear,”
Now brimming, happily forgiving, hope,
Refilling cranial stores to find,
Surviving, counts for little more than sustaining life, and wasting time.

Digressing now though more is there,
I advise you work, but ne’er care,
Hard work, and success are not the same,
But without the first you’ll reap the blame,
For being weak, and seeming lame,
To end I wish you all the best,
Catharsis exhausts, I needs must rest,
Good luck, “You’re hired” I hope you’ll find,
To ease your cares, and soothe your mind.

© 2009 AJA-B

A Jab at Work Survey

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